a new day, new thoughts. let's go. U2 plays as i type...with or without you...red wine's turned to water and the last remnants of a 6" sub lingers. new light was shed 3 days ago and its changed my life. input thats taken a bold and instinctive individual to bring to light. theres nothing like timing eh. i've been waiting for his words for years. are you in the game? have the stands become comfortable? do you watch the players on the court and think," man, i've got better moves then those fools! that should be me down there."
two realms of life starts to paint a picture.
work and love.
work. lets go. i've been told, by the king kong, the lion of lions, the alpha heights that if i want to rule the domain, its my osyter. and, as he speaks i know its true. i mean, we can all conquer, achieve, take on, accomplish SO much more then we're doing at this very minute and, we dont. why? whats holding us back? what is going on within each and everyone of us that stops full progression? lets get personal. i started working at a resto in the downtown core over a month ago. it feels like i've been there forever but in the same breath, everything feels super new, extremely frustrating and ultimately i feel intensely vulnerable. a newness i'm having a hard time embracing. but, in my previous career i rode the top platform and felt the same way. i was the "it" - making more money then i knew that to do with and, at the end of the day i couldnt wait for what was next. i dreamed about hitting the open road with a tent and backpack. and i did. yes to the open road. now, i'm at the bottom, starting again, taking on something completely new...and, i want to run -just like i did in my previous career. i want to give up. throw the towel in with a powerful thump and exit through two large doors that immediatly close with a pow. i mean, why should i give something my all when i know in my hearts of hearts its transitional? or is that train of thought, the train of it being transitional, something weve told ourselves all things in life are and will always be. i'm in the stands, i know. and you are too. have we approached our whole lives this way?
have i taken the stand seat because everything superficially comes easy that ive become unable to stick it out and give it the grease im now realzing life demands. have i been riding the coat tails of easiness as oppose to conducting the orchestra? my fear, which i feel is a common thread is that if i really give it my all, really get engrossed in this life i'll be lead to suffering, to loss, to dissapointment; to annoying co workers, to family demands, to a life that runs itself without any participation.well, i dont want that...so we give only small amounts of ourselves to the big picture. im not meaning to get all down and glum and wa wa styles but if were really going to go there, thens lets go there. i know that everything's all good. right. were all doing our thing and living life. good days bad days but whos really living out there true passion? whos waking up and feeling pumped to give it their all? so, to loop this back to where i started, im going to get in the game. so what if this new work environments only for a short time. if i get into it and give it my all then new doors will open. give it your all. if your giving it your all and not smiling...get the fuck out. walk away today...right now. pack your office up while booking the next flight to peru and walk it out. giver.
love. lets go there. do we coast...give only little bits of ourselves to either way too many people or to one person, and not fully present. like, "ya, the sex is ok" "most times when we chat its alright" "i havent grown as a person for the last little while but were happy" dude, pack and take the dog. are you in the stands or on the court? figure it out - lifes too short. spending time in your own companys actually really enjoyable. try it.
i cant tell you how thankful i am, as well as kinda turned on by the individual who brought all this to light. i've never spend the time to realize my true strengths.it doesnt happen overnight and no one can provide you the time. if your dreams are made through the hopes of someone else they can be that easily removed. if you build them yourself no one can take them away from you.
lets do this. catch me if you can 0x
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