"can you spare some change so i can experince these changes to there fullest...?"

change. what an oddly peculiar word. it looks weird, it sounds weird, it feels wierd to go through and feels even wierder when you dont have the right amount of it to experience something you feels important for your development.
the word change holds two extremely different meanings in our lives. "i need change for the subway" "i'd like to give change to that busker" "i am going through changes" "i'm changing" "you've changed."
the lateral meaning of change is having a major effect on my life and im not sure whether that has to do with age, as in getting older or if its a spiritual thing. i'm finding change to be an extremely powerful, very personal and maturing experience.
i have chosen, through my own free will to leave the only professional carreer i've known and i stepped onto the open road over the last 3 months to experience a spiritual change.
what ive come to realize though is that change never ends. the real journey at that time was the world, now my real journey exists here in a stationary day to day life.
there's more then meets the eye when we think about change.
is change something we'll ever get use to? i mean, will we one day wake up after a sequence of or an indiviual experience of change (professional change, relationship end or beginning, the death of a loved one, the birth of a loved one) and say, ya i'm 100% ok with this/these changes. is it something we should question or simply surrender to. change has such emotional intensities i wonder what were all doing to release its energy.
what fears and successes do we attach to change? sometimes we wait to long to make the change and our lives are effected. sometimes we think we need the change at that given time but its too soon. sometimes we feel that change is right but then days, years later we reflect and realize that the change may not have been the right decision.
i feel that we've used age as our lever for change and i dont think its right. i feel like were harnessed by this invisible rope called age and the rope gets tighter and tigher as time goes, giving us this complexity about our life. our spirit however doesnt exist in time, it doesnt function in the same way as man has made our concept of time. our spirit becomes more and more free as time goes on, as we age, so change and spirit are in conflict.
can change be enjoyed? catch me if you can 0x